And you only thought G went on vacation in real life! We had cameras following G around 24/7 for all his vacation antics! What happens in Azeroth... gets plastered all over the internet for everyone to see!
Part 1: Hot Springs Action!
Gharnl arrived in Un'Goro looking for some serious R&R. He checked out a few of the sights, and wandered around the area a little. His guidebook was a little vague on the details, but there was some mention of dinosaurs and hot springs.
Gharnl wrote:You know, I was a little skeptical about the deal when the travel agent kept asking me to sign a 300 page waiver that mentioned something about dismemberment... or was it gender discrimination? Painful death? Whatever it was, I signed it anyway. This trip was cheap!
Gharnl found the locals weren't as friendly as he thought, and decided to go for some greener pastures (i.e. ladies, ladies, and more ladies).
He took advantage of some of the attractions at the hot springs, and relaxed a bit by the water, taking advantage of the open bar.
Gharnl wrote:That sold me on the whole trip, man. Open bar? Hell, I'll close that shit down faster than you can say FROSTSHOCK. Was a crazy night, I'll tell you what.
A word to any traveler: keep your room locked. While Gharnl was out enjoying the night amongst the dinosaurs, he was robbed and left naked and penniless -- gold, mount, hearthstone, the works. Next time I'm sure he'll remember.
Gharnl wrote:Yeah, I'll admit I went a little overboard with the whole Tarzan thing. But you shoulda seen the way some of those stegosaurus ladies were looking my way. You saw them, right? Cause they were checking me out. Totally were checking me out.
Part 2: Farmer's Daughters
Mairn took a different route, going for the "middle of nowhere" motif.
Turns out he wasn't as much of a charmer as he thought, and the nightlife was a bit limited.
Mairn wrote:C'mon! You can't blame me for that necrophilia thing. She stopped me before I could explain! And then stole all my stuff after she knocked me out, anyway. Now I have no money AND no ladies.
Being a self motivated guy, however, Mairn wasn't to be stopped. He decided to throw his own party with the local mining community. All... all two of them.
Mairn wrote:Wasn't that a sick party?! I totally rocked out. People DIED at my party, man. That's how good it was. You can't compete with this.
From what the cameras could see, he was the only one dancing.
Mairn wrote:So this vacation was a bust. At least I didn't end up naked and penniless. I ended up naked, penniless, and skinless! Do I know how to freaking party or what?
Jerry Springer's Final Thought
If you happen to go on vacation, make sure to do the following:
1) Have a good time.
2) Bring your friends.
3) Lock your room.
Don't do the following:
1) Give your friends access to your WoW account.
2) Don't say something like this in the same breath:
Gharnl wrote:... if I wake up naked in Ironforge with no gear, money, or hope for getting home, I'll hunt you down, pull you into the street, and shoot you in the mouth.
It'll only give them ideas. Hilarious ideas. So please, take care of yourselves, and each other.